COLIN MOCHRIE, GREG PROOPS and BRAD SHERWOOD, the popular comedians of the Emmy nominated show Whose Line Is It Anyway?, discuss their final day on earth…
COLIN MOCHRIE
What can audiences expect from your upcoming comedy show?
An interactive, goofy night of laughs. Also, I’ll be doing scenes from Coriolanus.
Have you ever felt like you’ve died onstage during a stand-up gig?
The Whose Line guys did a corporate gig in Hawaii for car salesman who had never seen the show. The only laughs we got were from the performers not on stage at the time. We like to support in that way.
How do you want to die?
After a healthy bout of lovemaking, a fantastic meal and a pedicure. Hopefully all at the same time.
What’s your last meal?
Christmas turkey dinner with stuffing, mashed potatoes, veggies, gravy, biscuits, trifle and a Diet Coke.
Do you have any deathbed confessions?
I’ve never seen Schlindler’s List.
Are you going to Heaven or Hell and why?
Going to Heaven with a time share in Hell. I like to cover my bases.
What do you say to God and the Devil when you get there?
What took you so long to get to me?
Which legendary people will you hang out with in the afterlife?
George Carlin, Leonardo Da Vinci, Monet and Humphrey Bogart. We’d trade recipes.
What’s the worst joke you’ve ever heard during your time on Earth?
Why do mice have small balls? Because only 11 in the world know how to dance.
What’s the dumbest thing you ever did on Earth?
A woman I was seeing wouldn’t let me break up with her till she found someone else, so I agreed. Luckily it was only a week.
Name one thing you’re glad you’ll never have to do again?
Dating. It was bad before technology and I can’t even imagine what it would be like now.
What or who would you like to be reincarnated as?
I’d like to come back as me because I’m starting to get the hang of it.
What are your friends saying over your casket?
I thought he was getting cremated?
What are your family saying over your casket?
I still can’t believe the deal we got on this casket!
What’s written on your tombstone?
This is better than a Hawaiian corporate.
Got any last words?
Yes, Whose Line was all totally improvised.
GREG PROOPS
What can audiences expect from your upcoming comedy show?
Tears, drinking and laughter, then we go onstage.
Have you ever felt like you’ve died onstage during a stand-up gig?
Why? What have you heard?
How do you want to die?
In a bowl of hot chocolate.
Do you have any deathbed confessions?
I’m the Grand Duchess Anastasia.
What’s your last meal?
You buying? My Wife makes a swinging New Orleans BBQ shrimp sandwich. That, and a post dinner joint.
Are you going to Heaven or Hell?
Both. First Heaven then when I get bored it’s down to where the good music is.
And what do you say to God and the Devil when you get there?
Could’ve used more time, Lady. If it’s the devil, “F–k you, for Trump.”
What’s the worst joke you’ve ever heard during your time on Earth?
Every crap my girlfriend is so fat, bitchy etc…
What’s the dumbest thing you ever did on Earth?
Use Facebook for a few years before it was revealed they are evil incarnate.
What or who would you like to be reincarnated as?
Me, I think I could do it better if I had a second chance.
What are your friends saying over your casket?
“He finally lost weight.”
What are your Whose Line… cast members saying over your casket?
“He shut up at last.”
What’s written on your tombstone?
Feminist.
Got any last words?
This vodka is delicious.
BRAD SHERWOOD
What can audiences expect from your upcoming comedy show?
They will be spitting milk through their noses – don’t forget to bring milk.
How do you want to leave this world?
Riding into the sunset, on a dolphin-pulled sea chariot, into a thick fog of laughing gas.
Do you have any deathbed confessions?
Yeah, I killed a….wait a minute – this isn’t my deathbed, this is a media interview. Holy shit! I almost confessed to a… crap! I almost did it again!
What’s your last meal?
Dinner.
Are you going to Heaven or Hell?
There’s a stairway to Heaven and a highway to Hell – I’ve never cared much for exercise.
What do you say to Godand the Devil when you get there?
You have a lot to explain about the existence of war, childhood disease and seahorses.
Which legendary people will you hang out with in the afterlife and what do you say to them?
“Hi, John, I’m sorry to bother you, but, apparently, I get to hang out with you whether you like it or not. Will you sing “Imagine’ for me?”
What’s your greatest body of work that never saw the light of day?
My dramatic acting never saw the light of day, because of my dramatic acting.
What’s the worst joke you’ve ever heard during your time on Earth?
The worst joke I’ve ever heard was during my time on Mercury.
What’s your greatest achievement during your time on Earth?
Leaving the world funnier than I found it.
What’s the dumbest thing you ever did on Earth?
Stressed about things beyond my control.
Name one thing you’re glad you’ll never have to do again?
Answer these questions.
What or who would you like to be reincarnated as?
A wealthy golden retriever.
What are your friends saying over your casket?
“How are two of us going to carry this thing?”
What’s written on your tombstone?
“I wanted to be cremated.”
CATCH THESE WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY? GUYS AT THE AAMI JUST FOR LAUGHS AT THE SYDNEY OPERA HOUSE ON NOVEMBER 22
For the full article grab the December 2018 issue of MAXIM Australia from newsagents and convenience locations. Subscribe here.
