To write about Jess Hart is no easy task. Nor is it a difficult task, if we were content to just rephrase her Wikipedia entry and make up outrageous claims that, unless you went ahead and googled them, you’d believe. E.g. as part of NASA’s Sexy In Space 2013 program, Jess will become the first model ever to visit Mars. Feeble intergalactic humour aside, why is writing about the 25-year-old, Sydney-born, Melbourne-raised, internationally recognised looker such a challenge? It’s the surname. It was a goddamn homophone overload.Like, what the f—k were we supposed to title this piece? Hart-breaker? Hart’s On Fire? Home (and By ‘Home’ We Mean ‘Our Weird Fantasy Involving A Horse Head Mask’) Is Where The Hart Is? As you can see, we opted for anatomical wordplay and went with Hart Attack, because that’s been exactly the case over the past decade.
“I won the Dolly modelling competition in 2000. My auntie took me to a shopping centre and entered me. She always wanted to take photos of me and I wouldn’t let her. I have a gap in my teeth – I saw that as a down thing,” Jess told the Sydney Morning Herald newspaper in 2009. At age 15 it was a case of, “Later, high school. Yo, modelling world. ’Sup?” Probably not in these exact words but as Jess’s portfolio grew, so did demand for her brand of lithe, sun-kissed sexiness (that distinct dental quirk couldn’t have hurt in building plenty of recognition, either).
From there, she made like a helium balloon with a jetpack strapped to it and soared to the dizzying heights of the industry. Making the informed choice of doing an image search for ‘Jessica Hart Hot’ at work instead of checking emails reached a critical level for the first time in 2009. The cause was twofold: Jess not only featured heavily in Victoria’s Secret ad campaigns that year but also cranked the heat in the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition. Suffering from a chronic case of what modern medical professionals refer to as ‘Looking Totes Babelicious in Not Much Clothing’, it only made sense for Aussie swimwear giant Seafolly to cast her in its 2010 campaign. Then last year, Mambo realised the Hart family’s DNA blueprint superiority and recruited Jess and younger sister Ashley as representative Goddesses. And we thought BHP Billiton made good business decisions.
New York-based Jess is now the proud owner of multiple ambassadorships and, only a couple of months ago, made her debut at the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show – yes, the multi-million dollar, lingerie and jewel encrusted arousal extravaganza. How did she prepare her rig for a runway stint where even the slightest of flesh jiggles is a cardinal sin? “I’ve been going to the gym every minute I can get, and when I’m not working in the gym I’m taking Flybarre classes [a full-body combo of yoga, dance, circuit training, Pilates, and strength],” she told the blog Hollywood Life in November. “One day… I had the whole day off, so I worked out three times that day.” This torturous regime obviously worked a treat because, as Jess took to the stage in her miniscule, candy coloured outfit, alongside our favourite performer, Justin Bieber, we didn’t even attempt to sing along to “Beauty and a Beat”. We’re sure the Martians would be similarly enamoured if NASA pulled their finger out and got around to making Sexy In Space finally happen.
To grab a digital copy CLICK HERE. All past issues available for download.
To subscribe CLICK HERE. Australian residents only.
iPad Application also available. CLICK HERE. All past issues available for download.
