Alright, guys. We get it. The world knows you love getting blowjobs, and you should know that we have our reasons as women for loving to give them as well. But if you want to keep a steady supply of that reciprocation headed your way, it’s in your best interest to arm yourself with knowledge. Lean in close and pay attention to the seven commandments of going down on a woman. It’s better to give than receive, after all.
YOUR TONGUE IS NOT A MINIATURE, WET PENIS
So stop using it to have sex with her. You know what I’m talking about. That monotonous in-out-in-out poking sequence that goes on forever. Tongue-f—king is hot for short, three-second bursts, but remember that might not give her any orgasm-worth feelings, because her sweet spot is a few micro-paces north of where you are now. With over 8,000 nerve endings, her clit is twice as sensitive as a penis, so keep that in mind as your number one priority. But we didn’t have to tell you that, right?
WATCH AND LISTEN
Pay attention to what she’s doing. If she’s squirming, moaning, and clawing at the sheets, congratulations! Keep up the good work. If she looks bored, she probably is, which means it’s time to employ a different technique. As adult film star Ryan Driller told MAXIM, “[Listening] gives you every indication of everything, whether she likes the dinner, whether she’s happy with what you just did. Whether it be in the bed, out of the bed, on the street, wherever. So listen. Don’t respond, just listen.”
USE MORE THAN JUST YOUR TONGUE
Channel your inner Selena Gomez, and don’t keep your hands to yourself. Finger her while putting your tongue to good use, because penetration + stimulation = orgasm.
TEASING IS PLEASING
Women on average need more foreplay than men to get into the swing of things, so spend some time warming her up before diving in. Kiss her neck and make your way down to her inner thighs, touch her lightly, and throw in a few dirty words for good measure. If she’s begging you to get to work before you’ve even approached oral territory, you’re off to a good start.
COMPLIMENT, COMPLIMENT, COMPLIMENT. AND COMPLIMENT
There’s nothing sexier for a woman receiving oral than hearing her vagina is amazing. Tell her how good she tastes, how sexy she looks, and how much you want to eat her out. It’ll do wonders. Even if it’s not your favourite item on the menu, act excited when it arrives at your table. When you’re enthusiastic about it, she’s going to be that much more turned on.
DIFFERENT STROKES FOR DIFFERENT FOLKS
There are so many things you can do with your tongue that you’ve got no excuse not to try different techniques and see what she likes. You can make your tongue flat, pointy, stiff, or soft, you can draw circles, suck, or flick… the list goes on. If you strike a chord she obviously likes, keep at it.
ASK HER WHAT SHE LIKES
Don’t just assume she likes it when you bury your entire face in her crotch — ask her what she wants you to do and what feels good. When you get into a good rhythm and she’s about to orgasm, resist the urge to speed up or change anything. Trust that you both communicate honestly enough that she’ll tell you if something’s not working.
Now, go ahead and get out there. As they say, practice makes perfect.
BY ZEYNEP YENISEY
For the full article grab the April 2016 issue of MAXIM Australia.
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